Blog No. 243 – Rebirth: How I Am Making Myself Come Alive Again, Part 4 – 5 May 2025

 Blog 241 finished with extracts from my diary for Saturday 26 April 2025, the day I went to Sydney and attended a concert by Hans Zimmer.

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My friend Juan Acosta is talented in so many areas, and his work leaves me breathless.  He told me once that he was taught how to paint by a homeless man in his original home, Venezuela.  The homeless man must, like Juan, have been astonishingly talented - and kind.  Although he had no home of his own, he still found the energy to teach my friend how to pain.  

Juan has given me permission to publish this photo.  I again remind readers that my photo and the painting itself are covered by copyright and readers do NOT have permission to copy them without prior permission.

I interpret this painting as also revealing the total magic of the process of birth and rebirth.  The sun is a diamond and it radiates light and life throughout the universe.  Thank you my friend for letting me use your work in my blogs.  

Although every one of us is walking wounded, the universe does not want us to stay this way forever.  You very definitely matter, and without you, the world cannot continue to exist and it cannot heal.  

Let us heal ourselves and the universe in which we live.

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11.40 am Sunday 27 April 2025 – Rebirth Day 8 Sunday is officially the first day of the week, so I have now officially been reborn for one complete week. Day 7 of my rebirth finished with a tumultuous concert celebrating God’s creation of the universe through sound. The Hans Zimmer concert started with complete silence interrupted occasionally by almost unnoticeable sounds.  The unnoticeable sounds somehow joined together and formed a coherent noisy structure … and the structure became the universe in miniature, complete with the explosive noise of stars as they became supernovas. When the supernova explosions had finished, back we were with silence, but somehow, now the silence had physical structure. Music is sound and sound is surely one of the instruments used by the creator to bring the universe into existence. God yawns and makes a yawning noise … and we humans acquire structure and substance. Or maybe I have it all wrong.  Perhaps God makes a yawning noise and the universe is filled with nothing except the sound of God yawning. If God could be bothered trying to explain, I probably would not be able to understand the explanation anyway.  How can I understand God when I am not God?  I might as well ask an ant what it thinks I am.  I would be wasting my energy on the stupid and impossible. In zombie movies, the plots revolve around humans trying to exist in a world filled with the dead who are dead … but not quite dead. Here is a question. Is not being dead the same thing as being alive? This is my answer. To be alive, you have to be alive.  Simply being a not quite dead corpse (or zombie) does not mean you are alive. Since Margaret’s death, I have been an animated corpse – breathing, walking, talking and going through the motions of being alive – but I have not really been alive.  The spark that kept me alive was Margaret.  Deprived of the Margaret spark, I have been a zombie. I have not been dead, but I have not been alive either. I am reminded of graffiti painted on a fence I used to see as I travelled by train to Flinders Street Station in Melbourne.  The graffiti said “Is unbeing dead being alive?”  I can easily answer the graffiti question.  Unbeing dead is definitely not the same thing as being alive. Now though, I am doing something that never happens in zombie movies. I have become a zombie who has breathed life back into himself.  The undead has become reborn and I am now exactly one week old. We can all be reborn.  We can all do this impossible feat. Join me. Walk away from your sorrow. Look at the rain drizzling down outside the window and see what it truly is. Before rain can fall, part of the universe must die. When part of the universe dies, it evaporates into the sky. In the sky, the evaporation becomes rain. The rain renews life on Earth and the cycle of life is renewed once more. Life renews itself. We can all walk away from the shadow lands. We can all be reborn. Let us all be reborn together.

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My next diary entry sets out some of the tools I have used to help me survive what has happened to me.  Some of those tools may also help you in your own voyage of rebirth.  I most certainly hope so.  You will need to try them and see whether they help you or not.

With much love.