116 – Slowing the Slide Towards Death Part 6: 9 December 2024

Because of the Covid epidemic, Australia had closed its international borders.  Although there were no restrictions on leaving South Australia, there were severe restrictions on entering South Australia.  This meant Anne Ryan was stuck in Adelaide and could not return to Ireland.  This was not a great hardship because she owned her own unit at Glenelg and she had full use of my car free of charge.  Anne regularly walked with me at Morialta on Sundays and on at least one day during the week – usually Tuesday or Thursday.

I took this photo of Anne’s friend Mary O’Toole (left) and Anne Ryan on Tuesday 19 May 2020.

I took this photo of a koala perched up a tree at Morialta on Tuesday 14 April 2020.

This is a view of some of the mountains at Morialta; I took this photo on Tuesday 14 April 2020.

Despite my body’s rapid slide towards death, I kept up my walking at Morialta.  I felt that if I stopped, my death would not be a mere possibility but a complete certainty.

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When I saw Dr Pant on Wednesday 27 May 2020, she found no medical issues with my sinuses.  There was inflammation of my left nostril which Dr Pant thought might be the result of stomach reflux or an allergic response by my nostril subsequent to the sinus operation.  She recommended doubling my dosage of anti reflux pills for a two week period plus the addition of Gaviscon (another anti reflux medication).  She also recommended twice daily nasal irrigation with Pulmicort 1 /2 milligrams for 2 weeks.  She also referred me to Dr Aiyappan a respiratory specialist.

I took the Gaviscon and Pulmicort for the two weeks recommended by Dr Pant and there was no improvement.  The coughing got steadily worse, rather than better.

By this point I desperately needed something which was strong enough to suppress the coughing because it was literally destroying me.  I also needed sleeping pills which were strong enough to override the coughing and enable me to sleep despite the coughing.  I was utterly exhausted by lack of sleep and the never ending coughing.  My body was a wreck.

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Because of the constant coughing, my health deteriorated dramatically.  I was certain my life was seriously threatened by the constant coughing.  I could feel that the suture line from the open heart operation was under extreme strain.  I was certain something would give way.  By then, I had experienced 11 months of constant sneezing from May 2019 to February 2020, followed by the sinus operation on 25 February 2020, followed by constant convulsive coughing since the middle of April 2020.

The coughing continued without respite.  The coughing was at its worst at night but it was also present for much of the daylight hours - sometimes for hours on end, I got paroxysms of coughing.  I felt as if my insides were going to erupt.  I was totally exhausted most of the time.  Margaret was a registered nurse and at night when I was asleep, she could hear strident noises on inspiration and expiration.  She thought they were coming from the lower throat and not from the lungs.

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I returned to A & E in the afternoon of Tuesday 9 June 2020.  Dr Bishop, (the A & E doctor) confirmed the previous diagnosis given by A & E and prescribed Rikodeine 100 mil to suppress the coughing, plus Pulmicort budesonide 200 inhaler.  I took these in the evening of Tuesday 9 June and they had an immediate effect.  I slept from 10:30 pm to 3:40 am on Wednesday 10 June 2020.  This was the best sleep I had then had in about 9 weeks.

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As an aside, I would now be ecstatic if I could sleep from 10.30 pm to 3.40 am on a regular basis.  My sleep since Margaret died on 22 August 2023 has usually finished somewhere between 12.30 am and 3.15 am.  I remain constantly exhausted.  My sleep today (9 December 2024) finished at 3.15 am.

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My weight had increased significantly after the open heart operation.  It had been 98 kilograms in November 2018.  By November 2019, it had become 108 kilograms.  I then began a strict routine of diet control plus exercise.  My weight on Wednesday 29 July 2020 had dropped to 89.8 kilograms.  By July 2020, I did 3.5 hours of hard walking at Morialta every Sunday plus an additional 2.5 hours of walking at Morialta with Anne Ryan on Tuesdays.  I had also been doing 1 hour of what I called easy walking near my home every day since early January 2020.

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The coughing was not the only symptom that I was ill in the first half of 2020. 

My optical migraines had increased in frequency since the open heart surgery from once every six months to once or twice every week.  I still get them.  They last for about 20 minutes and then go away.  The optical migraines give me distorted vision and it is nearly impossible to read while they are under way.  Compared to the coughing, the optical migraines were easy to put up with.

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I started meditating for one hour every day in late March 2014.  I am certain that being able to meditate gave me the skills that enabled me to live through the horrendous events I am summarising in these Blogs.  As an example, when my chances of survival looked very grim, I would slip into a meditative state and eliminate my panic.  I am certain the ability to avoid panic, was the key to me living when it would have been so easy to simply give up.